hello my lovelies,
I can’t believe how quickly this years gone. Well tomorrow is my Golden Birthday, which is when someone turns the age of their birth date.
Very excitingly, tomorrow, I turn 18 years old and despite the fact three years ago I fell ill, I can honestly say I’ve had the best first 18 years a girl could ask for and I’m looking forward to many more. It’s had its ups and certainly had its downs but all this has made me stronger as a person and taught me so many valuable lessons.
So today I thought I’d do 18 things I’ve learnt over the years!
1. “Friendship is not about who you’ve known the longest, it’s about who came and never left” – I’ve lost so many friends over the years and I’ve learnt that it isn’t about who you’ve known for years on end, it’s about those who continue to stay by your side through your good and bad days. The ones who support you and make sure they carry you through the hard times. That’s a true friendship in my eyes. “friendship” is not something were friends stab one another in the back but always end up back in each others arms!
2. “Family is so precious” – without my family I wouldn’t be where I am today. I’m so lucky to have the most supportive, loving, kind, encouraging and strong family who I love to death.
3. “Don’t judge people before getting to know them” – let’s be honest, we’ve all done this in our life even if it was once but the last three years I’ve learnt that getting to know someone is so important before making any kind of judgement on them. I find judgment usually comes from rumours but as I’ve grown older I’ve realised most rumours aren’t true and even if they are, as long as they haven’t done anything to hurt you or anyone you love, why judge?.
4. “Your gut instinct is always right so listen to your gut” – (even though mine doesn’t work😉 good old gastric pun there), I hate that this is true. I hate that horrid feeling in the pit of your stomach that you get when you know something is/has happened but your wishing it isn’t true, I’ve found it always is. To be honest there isn’t many times my gut instinct has been a good one but I’ve learnt to listen to it and prepare myself for whatever is about to be thrown my way.
5. “Don’t take people or life for granted as no one knows what’s round the corner” – I’ve learnt this the hard way! No one knows what’s going to happen tomorrow, so love and appreciate those who surround you as anything could happen. Obviously we all hope & pray the worst doesn’t happen but sometimes life throws hurdles at us and unfortunately your not guaranteed tomorrow. I’ve lost three very important people in my life who didn’t deserve to go so soon and I wish there was more I said to them before they left this earth which is why I can now be the cringest person going but I don’t care. The people around me deserve to know how much they mean to me otherwise I wouldn’t feel happy within. All I can hope is that my three angels in heaven know how much I love & adore them.
6. “Take lots of pictures for memories wether there good or bad, it’s always nice to look back and see how far you’ve come” – this is something I swear by. My hard drive contains well over 10,000 photos that I’ve gathered over the years, some containing photos of people I don’t speak to anymore but I’d never delete them as at that moment in time, we was making some good memories. I love remising over old times with my friends, pulling out the days when our fashion was some what questionable and being able to feel the memories pouring back into my brain, it comforts me on my bad days and makes me laugh on my good. Plus keeping photos from years ago is always a bonus when it’s your friends or families birthday haha.
7. “Education is so important, don’t take it for granted as others don’t get that chance in life” – when I first fell ill I truly believed my education was down the drain but thankfully, due to my home tutors they allowed me to continue my education and only now have I realised how important it is to me to succeed in life and make something of myself. I’ve always pushed to be the best I can be, I’ve had a dream of getting my GCSE’s then my ALevels and finally get a degree in forensic science, that’s what I plan to carry on to do. So many people just can’t be bothered to learn and it confuses me, some have concrete reasons whereas others just simply can’t be bothered. in this country we are incredibly lucky to have what we do as other countries don’t. We have a chance to work, make money and make something of ourselves so why waste it all when you could have it all?
8. “Talking about your thoughts and feelings is so important, as keeping them locked away only causes heartache” – this statement couldn’t be anymore true. Since becoming ill I’ve found I lock away many of my thoughts and feelings as I like to come across positive person. I believe that’s the person I’ve always been and I didn’t want to loose that when this nightmare happened but I began to realise I was loosing myself whilst trying so hard not to. January this year I struggled a lot, I haven’t spoken about this until now but I did struggle badly. I found confiding in my therapist about my thoughts has put me in a positive mindset now and I haven’t been this happy within since I can remember. I’ve learnt from my therapist it’s okay to speak out when needs must as my mental health is far to important to watch go down hill like my physical health is. I believe speaking out is so important which is why I always say if anyone needs a person to listen, a shoulder to cry on or someone to scream/rant at, I’m your girl.
9. “Self care is so important” – looking after you is important too. We can get so tied up in looking after others that we sometimes forget that we ourselves need looking after just as much. We can’t look after others if we don’t look after ourselves properly and take time for ourselves. Taking time away, de-stressing, having a make over, brushing your hair, having a well needed nap, taking a stroll or whatever you need to do or feel you need to do to make yourself feel better, do it! Looking after yourself mentally as well as physically is something we all should learn to do.
10. “Stepping outside your comfort zone could be the best decision you make” – you won’t know until you give it a try, that’s what I say. I’ve realised a lot that stepping outside your comfort zone could come with a very positive outcome. Starting college in a wheelchair was a huge thing outside my comfort zone but my word it’s the best decision I’ve ever made. I’ve watched my confidence go from 10 to 100 within just a few months, don’t get me wrong I have my days where I panic and get anxious but I’ve learnt that’s normal and pushing myself past that has made me a much stronger person.
11. “If someone doesn’t like you for you or try’s to bring you down for bettering yourself, walk away from them” – yes yes YES! This is so important. I’m one of these people who does anything for anyone no matter how it makes me feel emotionally. over the last year especially I’ve realised in order to make me happy, I need to leave those who brought me down behind as it will result in a much happier me. If someone doesn’t like you for you, don’t change as reality is, they’re probably jealous in some way or just trying to boost their ego. You are who you are, only change if you feel like it’s what’s best for YOU not others!
12. “Don’t settle for less than you deserve” – need I say more… .
13. “Always try your best at everything you do” – what’s the point in doing something if your only going to put half the effort in? if your going to do it; go all out or don’t do it at all, there shouldn’t be an in between. Ever since I was little I’ve always put my heart and soul into everything I do. I’ve had some pretty big hurdles to climb over the years, many that I didn’t think were possible to ever climb over but I made sure I put every last bit of energy, strength, effort and determination into the things I do and in the end, I got over them hurdles. It could take hours, days, weeks, months or years but as long as your working your absolute hardest, doing everything you can to make it work, it will. These things take time, DON’T GIVE UP!
14. “Do what you love” – I’ve found that in this life, if you don’t do what you love you’ll end up very unhappy. Take college for example, why go to college and do a subject you hate? As you’ll end up either being very miserable, skipping classes or dropping out which isn’t what you want so when choosing your courses, choose what you love and do it. I always say, “find what you love and do a lot of it”.
15. “Actions speak louder than words” – another saying I believe in. Someone can tell/promise you something over and over but until they’ve actually done what they said and promised, I don’t tend to take any notice. Actions to me are very important and are the building blocks to a good relationship.
16. “A dog is a mans best friend” – this couldn’t be more true, my fur baby is my absolute world. She has continued to bring such happiness into my life, she always makes me feel better and she’s my best friend. I can’t imagine life without her!
17. “It’s okay to be different” – something I’ve always believed in. I’ll be honest, I’ve never followed a crowd or followed a trend, I’m my own unique person and if you don’t like me, my personality or my style than that’s up to you. I refuse to change who I am just to please someone else or be part of a “group”. I’m so inspired by those who have no care in what people think as in this generation, the majority of people are so judgemental that it’s hard to be completely yourself. I think being unique is being true to yourself and that’s so important. Be happy with who you are and don’t ever follow a crowd. People will love you for you and if they don’t, walk away from them.
18. Finally, I’ve learnt that “a smile is the best piece of makeup a girl can wear” – a beautiful quote said by Marilyn Monroe! smiling is so important, it’s what makes this world a beautiful place despite all the darkness. A smile can light a room very quickly. a smile can make such a difference to your daily life that I believe everyone should wear one, always!
These are 18 things I’ve learnt in my 18 years of life. Although some of these have been so hard, I’m glad I’ve learnt each lesson and can continue life having learnt them so soon. I can imagine most of you reading can relate with this post, have learnt these lessons or agree with some of what I’ve been saying and I want you to know that these things I’ve learnt have made me such a happier, caring, grateful and positive person. I hope they’ve made you feel the same too.
Here’s a little timeline of my life;
Learning these life lessons isn’t always easy but it’s usually for the best and teaches you some very important life skills.
I really hope you enjoyed today’s post, thank you all so much for everything over the years especially the last few months with my blog going live. Your all so incredibly kind, thoughtful & generous and I love you so very much!
I hope your all as well as possible.
Tons of love as always,
Happy Birthday beautiful!! Here is to many many more! Stay strong and amazing!
Wow! a very powerful blogpost. Thank you for sharing this Elle.